Morning Rush 351 (Conyo or Jeje Problems)

THE TOP TEN CONYO OR JEJE PROBLEMS

January 11, 2012 Episode – by Marioh Caryo, Jrhyan, etc.

FIRST BATCH

10. Emilinsang – OMG! My new iPhone is broken! I just bought it last week, sira na yung TV.

09. Jrhyan – Dad, last week I got 8 kidnap treats, now I’m only get 5, are we getting poor na?

08. Jrhyan – dude! Parang may problem tong iPhone ko weh, ano ba siya AA o AAA battery?

07. CherrytheGreat – you know what, the Bangko Sentral ng Pilipinas should really make 10,000-Peso Bill.

06. Iggypedia – Yaya! My credit card max na e, I have to book this flight! Can I borrow yours?

05. PahingingTubigz – dude, I change my yaya’s name into Siri so I won’t get confuse.

04. IamNotJohnLloyd – How much? (1,800 po!) Yucks so mahal ha, 1,500 na lang! (o sige po para sa inyo, imbes na 1,800… 1,500 na lang, para sa inyo) okay thanks manang here’s 2000… keep the changes!

03. IGTitular – I really need a Yaya! (Huh? Your Yaya left na? di ba you have a Yaya?) Yah! I need to get her an assistant.

02. Targrod – bad trip ha, I hate twitter… 140 characters lang ang pwede paano naman yung mga extra ‘X’ at ‘Z’ ko?

01. RenRenGoAway – Yah, my dad nga bought me a new car, branded! It’s Mercedes Bench!

SECOND BATCH

10. Yontipian – I hate my dad, I asked for iPhone 4S, and you know what he bought me? iPad2! Kaasar!

09. ButterBaby – Grabeh the restaurant ha, I ordered wine and they gave me ten-year-old wine! I throw it to their faces and told them, “Bakit luma?!”

08. Yontipian - I hate this palengke ha, where’s the VIP section?

07. Jrhyan – ewww ipessss! Yaya get my Bulgari perfume and spray on the ipes!

06. XtrianoRhoynaldo – I hate my dad! I asked him to buy me a California King Bed, kainesss pati si Rihanna sinama!

05. RenRenGoAway – So asar the Argentinian government, they’re making utang na naman from daddy.

04. HeyJude – Snatcher stole my iPhone!!!!! Yaya make him habol! Give him the charger!

03. Pawi – you know what song I really really hate? ‘I wanna be a billion’ I can’t relate eh.

02. Jrhyan – Let’s celebrate with champagne, I bring the Astig Pumante!

01. PaulJeffrey – Dude, you know what I really hate about riding business class? The only thing I really hate? Watching the poor people marching in front of me on their way to economy.

THIRD BATCH

10. Ogerald – hay naku I want to play sungka! But kulang my diamonds.

09. Jrhyan - Dad, the tambay sa corner make gasgas the car. Give them nga a car of his own to gasgas.

08. EricSacro – Hey what’s your zip code? (Dude, what part of the house?)

07. ButterBaby – dad, my car won’t start, so how’s that? How would I get to the bathroom?

06. LadyQuil – you know what! I really really hate riding jeepneys, kasi they don’t accept Amex.

TaguanPong – Sir, your total bill is 1,000 pesos (Dude, I don’t have cash e, do you accept gold bar?)

05. MadMathMark – I don’t follow you on twitter, therefore you don’t exist.

MarkMathMark – I hate autocorrect! It won’t allow eow!

04. D+Wayne – Dudeeeee!!!!! My dog made pupu in the mall! Bad trip nagkulang yung 500-peso-bill ko!

03. TsongPagong – is Chuwawa called Chuwawa? Kasi it’s like kawawa of being ugly?

XtrianoRhoynaldo – dada, my dog died! You get me another dog, any breed. Actually kahit askal nga lang eh, okay fine Phil Younghusband, get me him.

02. AngelRain – Palimos po… (Dude do you accept check?)

01. RunMDRun – Mom, that black truffle in the ref matigas na kasi I think its spoiled na eh (anak, wala tayong truffles, uling yun!)

FINAL BATCH

16. LutherLuther101 – Yaya, I can’t find my Prince Charming, use your GPS.

15. JayAlbis – Dude, the ‘J’ button fell off on my keypad!

14. RenRenGoAway – Dude, talo kayo sa new phone ko! It’s the latest in the market, clue! It’s a fruit? (Apple iPhone? Blackberry?) No dude, Cherry!

13. MarkoLaksamana – Hey dude, I wanna eat Belgian waffle, so I asked my Yaya to go to Belgia.

12. Ja-El – A jejemon got stab, and died of blood lost, unfortunately. But they discover he tries to text for help but he failed, his unfinished message went, “eow powszzz… helf”

11. Yontipian – I’m so tamad to go to school today, dada make it a holiday!

10. RCandCess – San ka nag-park? (dude, sa NAIA T3) dude ha baka ma-carjack ka ha! (Dude, hindi naman accord ang dala ko eh, concord!)

09. GBuenavista – I can’t come to your party my car is coding, unless you have a helipad.

08. Yogibench – Yaya I’m freezing! Make sunog the other Yaya.

07. Ja-El – I told my dad I don’t being driven to school using the Lamborghini, because everybody else riding the MRT, so later will buy the MRt.

06. Tinfinity – daddy, your Jeje pamangkin are making asar that I’m spoiled, can you spoil them too so I can asar them back?

05. Jepoy – Kaasar si dad, sabi ko I want to fly first class, he didn’t buy, he wants me to use his private jet.

04. IamNotJohnLloyd – Yaya, sira the electric fan, whip your hair back and forth.

03. Celie – OMG! Sayang my score sa angry birds, I didn’t make tira the pig (Nanay: Hoy! Ibaba mo yang mga sisiw ilalako ko pa yan sa palengke mamaya!)

02. Ogerald – Yaya bring me my eye drops!!! My eyes are so sakit!!! I saw someone pangit!

01. PitoPagod – dude, I love the toilet in Europe! You should try it! They all come with drinking fountain! (Bidet)

Glee Ending Credits Theme